Christmas Correspondence
CHRISTMAS CORRESPONDENCE
By Alex Wiggan
John ‘Good Guy’ Smith
Hi Kriss Kringle,
Thanks for accepting the friend request. Thought it best to post on your wall instead of sending a long letter, as I know you’re busy, and I can’t find a stamp (do they still make stamps?). Plus I was taggin pictures and I’m bored. Lol.
This year I’ve been a good boy; a really good boy in fact. On Saturday some randoms in Essential invited me to their ‘party’ (which I was very tempted to attend), but I turned them down as my boyfriend would not have been happy. Yep babe, this is the new me! So I think, as a reward, this Christmas I deserve something special in my stocking. I’m not askin 4 much, just a few things really, that would make the day a bit more exciting, as tbh last Christmas was dull (and don’t even get me started on New Year’s Eve). Anyway, I’m not saying last Christmas was all your fault; unless it was your idea 4 my fella to buy that ‘swing’? I wasn’t a big fan of that and I told him that it’s just not me. So, this Christmas I would like the following:
5. A signed photo of Harry from TOWIE
4. A home bake set with matching apron and oven gloves (sun blushed yellow or burnt orange)
3. World peace (there’s only so much I can do myself)
2. Tickets to the Steps reunion tour (front row please)
1. A personal Christmas message from Susan Boyle (made available on iTunes for my friends)
I don’t think I’m asking for 2 much, so if you could sort all this out 4 me I’d appreciate it. Gotta go now as I’ve got Made In Chelsea on Sky+ and I need to get ‘hubby’s’ tea on the table before he gets home.
XX
2 hours ago near Salford . Like
Kriss Peter Kringle and John ‘Good Guy’ Smith are now friends.
Today at 10.32am
“Kick off’s not til 3pm, so yeah I’d totally be up for showing her my…” on Dave Kringle’s wall.
Nov 29 at 11.32pm via Blackberry
“Nah, she won’t let me put it in there, not since…’’ on E. Bunny’s wall.
Nov 29 at 11.21pm via Blackberry
**Twitter**
DevilBoyDanny 2 hour
@TheRealSanta Oi Santa, why have you not accepted my FB friend request? This Twitter is hard cuz I can’t right everyfin I want 2 right.
DevilBoyDanny 1 hour
@TheRealSanta This yr az been epic and I had a well good wkend with @BigDickie who I pulled in the Viaduct. #hot!
DevilBoyDanny 1 hour
@TheRealSanta He was proper fit, but not exactly what I want for Crimbo. He’s not as big as he claims and I want bigger LMAO.
DevilBoyDanny 59 mins
@TheRealSanta I had to make do with my ‘little’ ex for most of this year and now I’d like a lot more for Xmas. A lot more than him anyway.
DevilBoyDanny 58 mins
@TheRealSanta So I’ve made a list of stuff I need. Can’t exist without any of this, so don’t let me down this Christmas haha #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 56 mins
@TheRealSanta To start I want Harry and Zayn from One Direction (or all of them if poss) #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 52 mins
@TheRealSanta I want at least an hour with Channing Tatum (so fit). Maybe two hours! #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 47 mins
@TheRealSanta Hahahah just seen the Coca Cola advert on TV with you in it! Funny lol
DevilBoyDanny 44 mins
@TheRealSanta Where was I? I need need need Frankie Cocozza now!!!!! #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 37 mins
@TheRealSanta I want you to tell my ex that he’s an ex 4 a reason and to giv me back my iPod!! Wot a jk! #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 35 mins
@TheRealSanta Can you tell @Lisa265 to hurry up and get ready cuz we were supposed to be at Keith’s an hour ago #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 34 mins
@TheRealSanta Keith’s jus text me and he ain’t happy. His bf’s messin him about again. Told him to dump his ass!! #lameuser
DevilBoyDanny 33 mins
@TheRealSanta And finally can I also hav a nu fone as this screen is broke and it’s doin my hed in!!! #xmaslist
DevilBoyDanny 12 mins
@TheRealSanta Thanx, you’ll hav to leave all these gifts with @DarylKnowsBest as @BigDickie just txt and he wants to meet to ‘watch a DVD’ ;)
DevilBoyDanny 8 mins
@TheRealSanta He txt back. As if he really wants to watch a DVD. Going on Grindr instead.