Can We Be Your Gay Best Friend – Sheridan Smith

Best known for playing Janet in Two Pints of Lager and A Packet of Crisps and Smiffy’s sister in Gavin and Stacey, Sheridan Smith is now being utterly adored (and rightly so) as Elle Woods in Legally Blonde: The Musical. Simon Savidge got to pass the time of day with her to see if a woman who spends every evening dressed in pink, dancing in glitter and holding a Chihuahua could be anything other than utterly camp.

Can We Be Your Gay Best Friend – Sheridan Smith

Apart from Legally Blonde, which is pink, glittery and so camp it hurts, what would you say the campest thing you have ever done is?

Oh, can I not say this musical as it’s utterly, utterly camp; really, really camp and I do so want to be the Queen of Camp. Will you know if I make something up? (Laughs) I do have a dog called Barry Manilow. I have been performing at places like Trannyshack recently. That’s been very camp, me with a lot of fabulous drag queens. I did Audrey in Little Shop of Horrors, that’s a very camp part, getting eaten by a plant in a negligee and fluffy mules. I like playing a nice camp part.

Getting eaten by a plant in mules is indeed a good one. We also love the idea of just making something up because she wants to be the Queen of Camp. 8/10

Kylie or Madonna?

Kylie, no question. I like early Madonna before all the weirdness. Kylie is cutesy and she always wears the most to die for amazing outfits at her concerts and I am all for that.

We couldn’t have put it better than ‘the weirdness’ ourselves, we also like the fact as gay men Sheridan assumes we know exactly what she means and we do. 8/10

Do you like a gossip, and do you have any?

I have to say I am rubbish with gossip, my friends all know everything before I do I am last to know. Though not knowing it doesn’t mean I don’t revel in it when I hear some juicy stuff. I have been so busy rehearsing and then doing the show I haven’t any. Shall I make some up? (Cackles with glee and then puts on a very steamy yet camp voice) Let’s make up some vicious gossip (giggles). You must have some… come on… tell me…

Oh yes… let’s make up some indeed! We also love the revelling, we have all been there and sometimes being the last to know makes it all the more special when you find something out. 9/10

When did you last have a diva strop?

I am not too good on diva or stropping. I spit my dummy out occasionally. I am good on high drama over the littlest things. Like, I could burn the toast and be in floods of tears saying ‘I can’t do this, I can’t make toast’ you know with your hand to your head in drama mode. It’s the smallest things that annoy me, like with the toast I will then be wailing ‘I will never be a cook’ and take to my bed.

Crying over toast has to be our new favourite morning breakdown and we will all be doing this for the rest of the year, ‘taking to my bed’ classic. Utter drama 11/10

Dressing room demands?

Well you’re in it so you can see… I don’t really have any. I wish I did, I would have loads of puppies. What would I do with them afterwards? I would take them home of course. My dream is to have a dog’s home… I already have three though -Barry Manilow, Enid and Trish – that’s enough. I get so many funny looks in the park. I would like another one called Dolly Parton. She’s my idol; I have karaoke parties at my house and sing 9 to 5… (grabs my knee) you HAVE to come to one.

Dogs with those names… Dolly Parton parties… oh goodness that almost breaks the scale. 12/10

Prada or Primark?

(Without hesitating) Primark, is that wrong? As Elle Woods I can say Prada, but as Sheridan it’s Primark, is that bad? No? Good.

We like the multiple personalities and the fact her role may have warped her into even camper territory if that’s possible. 7/10

How many gay friends are too many?

There are never too many gay friends in my world. I want to be Queen of the Fag Hags actually. That would be a good musical wouldn’t it, or a TV show? I never have a better night than if I go out with my gay friends; outfits are fierce, music is fierce, it’s all fierce. I was out at G-A-Y the other night dancing on some tables. I live with a couple of gay guys – it’s amazing. Obviously I have straight male friends too. It’s not all just gay men, though that would be fabulous. Can I be your fag hag? Can I? Yay!

We think Sheridan might be collecting gays and small dogs in some secret underground bunker… we are so joining the queue. 9/10

What’s your biggest extravagance, apart from Primarni?

Hmmm, I love my shoes, I really love my Loubies (Louboutin’s) mind you they have started to go a bit chavvy haven’t they as everyone loves the red sole. (We tell her Jennifer Lopez has done a song called Louboutin’s) Oh she hasn’t, really, no, oh no. I haven’t heard that… my gays haven’t updated my iPod with that number.

We love the fact she called a huge designer chavvy as they are on the verge of being so ‘last decade’ and the real shock of La Lopez’s next move. 7/10

What’s your best put down line?

(Waves her hand like she has a wand) You… turn to shit! I got that from a joke about a taxi driver who is driving a gay guy and the guy leaves his brolly in the car. The cab driver says (in a very butch accent) ‘oi fairy you left your wand’ so the gay guy gets it, waves it and says ‘turn to shit’. You have to do it with a fairy godmother swish though.

Oh… we… love… that one. Could carrying a wand in your man bag be the way forward? We might have to steal that and make it our own. 9/10

Do you like a good drama?

Do you mean watching one or being in one… oh you don’t mean a TV drama (laughs) silly me. Oh I love a bit of drama… we all do though don’t we? As I mentioned, I can have a drama over some toast. Yes, I am a bit of a drama queen. I think any actor is naturally very dramatic, it’s in our blood and we can’t be blamed… well that’s my excuse. I have been seeing someone new who says I am dramatic and I find myself saying (in a rather dramatic voice) Dramatic? Moi? Maybe I should make some up when I am bored?

We like the mix up though it almost became a sensible interview and that would never do. We also love a drama queen and one who wants to invent it. 9/10

89/100 – It’s official – Sheridan Smith is camper than camp and frankly we want to join her in her mission to have a dogs home filled with homo staff… now wouldn’t that be fabulous. All hail – Queen Sheridan of Fag Hags.

You can see Sheridan Smith in Legally Blonde: The Musical

Photos:Ellie Kurttz