Things not to say on the first date

1. “You look just like my father”

2. “I’m expecting a call from my ex.”

3. “Sorry, what’s your name again?”

4. “Have you thought about surgery?”

5. “My ex would love you… but he’s dead” (then start crying)

6. “Not for me, I get violent after one drink.”

7. “What are you thinking about?”

8. “Aren’t you an ickle wickle sweeetie.”

9. “My therapist says…”

10. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but…”